You know what I’m tired of? I’m tired of kid-less people (sometimes even friends) who think that because I’m the father of an infant, there’s all this stuff I can’t do.

I’m tired of people who suggest that because I’m charged with caring for a baby, I can’t go drinking on weeknights, can’t do dinner parties and can’t take extended reporting trips that—gasp!—might involve a diaper change or two.

Put simply, I’m tired of hearing other people assume that L’s existence crimps my style.

Let’s be frank: there are a few situations where having a baby changes the rules of the game a bit (for instance: we haven’t eaten as many fancy meals because L doesn’t do so well during eight-course tasting menus at business-casual restaurants). And yes, there are some instances where L’s presence necessitates walkabouts, shushing sessions or occasional sing-a-longs.

But no drinking? No dinner parties? People, I plan on having other kids, which means (at last check) L’s arrival hadn’t obliterated my manhood.

I wish I understood why those without kids have so many misconceptions about what parenthood supposedly means. Did their parents suddenly cease life when they (the haters) came along? Are all of their other friends really that lame?

Whatever the explanation, here’s a novel concept. Invite me and my family to dinner. We’ll bring a blanket for the baby to play on while we speak like grownups. If she poops, I’ll excuse myself to change her diaper; when she needs to eat, either I or my wife will disappear for a few moments to feed her. Finally, when the baby is tired, we’ll plop her on the aforementioned blanket, return to the table and eat/laugh/drink like most thirty-somethings do.

We can get drunk! We can be raunchy! Maybe we’ll even stay out late.

Sounds like fun, right? Amazingly, there are still some of us humans who can parent an infant and be regular people, too.